This week my youngest child started full-time education.  I gave up work to start cancer treatment in 2021 and have been at home ever since.  As a teacher in London running a department I’d have longed for days like these. This was the first week of the rest of my life.

After running errands, doing admin, meeting my mum for coffee and bleaching my teaspoons (yes, really) I found myself at a complete loss, on the verge of tears.  What to do next?!

I always knew this was coming.  People have been asking me how I’m going to fill my time for months.  I spent most of the blissful summer holiday dreading September.  The morning was fine but the afternoon felt interminable.

Yes, I’ve joined a gym.  Yes, I’ve got hobbies: horse riding, writing, baking.  Yes, I’ve joined the PTA and become a parent helper.  And yet.

I’m not well enough to work but I’m not currently ill enough to rest.    Of  course,  anxiety means any more than three things in the diary and I feel overwhelmed!

There’s no real point to this post.  Writing it offers me a way out of boredom for sure.  But maybe you can appreciate your busy life and purpose just that little bit more.  Maybe you can reply to that friend’s message, hold your toddler tight and go for that promotion while you have the opportunity.  I’m off to alphabetise my herb jars……